


C'est personne

by Gurkenkopf



Series: é-lu [1]
Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: Coda C'est personne, Episode 3 Season 3 Coda, Little bit of angst, M/M, Panic Attacks, Pov Eliott
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-09
Updated: 2019-02-09
Packaged: 2019-10-25 00:05:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17714246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gurkenkopf/pseuds/Gurkenkopf
Summary: For a moment Eliott hoped he would come, he was sure he would. Warm blue eyes would land on him and he could finally calm down, the world would stop moving so damn fast. That's how it felt with him. With him, everything slowed.- or coda from C'est personne in Pov of Eliott.





	C'est personne

**Author's Note:**

> First try to write something for those two love birds who currently own my ass.  
> Not an english native, so please excuse my errors and correct me if you want!  
> Wrote this before the clips on friday.  
> Hope you enjoy xx

Dude. **Dude**. _Dude?_

What was that. He thought they had… Something. Eliott just simply didn’t understand. What did he do wrong? The look on Lucas face, it was so different, so closed off. Was it because of his friends? Was he embarrassed? Was it.. Did, did he find out?

His steps came to a stuttering halt in the middle of the corridor. Someone must have told him. Lucas knew, he knew. Little white dots appeared in his line of vision and his stomach constricted. It was too hot, his hands began to sweat. Not again please, please, please. The ringing in his ears got louder and louder. He coudln't do this again. He had to get out of here, his thoughts already racing and running a marathon. If Lucas knew, how many others would too? He let his eyes wander for a second, people starred at him. They knew. No. nononononono. A jagged breath escaped him, and he nearly bolted through the school doors.

As fast as he could he walked to their bus stop. _Their?_ His! His bus stop. Acid taste in his mouth, he felt like he had to vomit. Agonizing minutes ticked by as he waited. His mind all over the place but somehow only focused around one person. For a moment Eliott hoped he would come, he was sure he would. Warm blue eyes would land on him and he could finally calm down, the world would stop moving so fast. He could breath again. That's how it felt with him. All the time it felt like he was on a fucking roller-coaster, staggering out of control without a safety belt. But with him, it slowed. The noises became background music, soft and sweet. He could hear his own mind think clearly, for what seemed like the first time in months. He felt…. _He felt._ He had feelings and he was so stupid again. He should have known. This whole week he thought about this moment. How he would return the damn scarf. But nothing went as planned. Well that wasn’t such a big surprise life never ran as planned for him, but in all the different scenarios it never occurred to him that Lucas would be this cold. In his daydreams he always greeted him with his  daring but still somehow shy smile. Blue eyes on him with such an enormous intensity that he simply could not not get lost in them.

What did he do wrong? Did he really read, interpret the situation so wrong? He went through their whole day in his mind. All their conversation, his “how would you draw me?” His eyebrow raise, his proud little smile while he played the piano. He couldn’t have read that wrong? He was so sure that the little piano piece was something Lucas would only share with him. Something special, something promising. This damn piece was even called “ I love you”. That couldn’t have been a coincidence now could it?

When he finally flopped down on his bed, Eliott was tired. So so very tired of thinking. One minute he was sure he imagined it all, their moments, Lucas affection towards him. The other minute he knew even he couldn’t dream something up like this. He starred onto the celling, his phone constantly lighting up the darkening room. How much time had passed? He thought he found a friend in Lucas, _Dude._ a connection. Someone he could trust, someone he maybe even could rely on. _Dude._ But what happened today? Was it because he found out? _Dude_. Or was it simply because of his friends there. Did they all know? Or maybe Lucas didn’t want them to know about him. _Dude._ But why? Did Eliott corner him? Was it too much? _Dude. Dude. Dude._ Loud knocking on the door broke him out of his racing thoughts.

“Eliott! Eliott! Are you in here? Please open up!” the voice was laced with worry. Lucille. He could hear the keys jingling as she opened his door. Great, his parents gave her the key. He thought they promised to not do it. But immediately as he saw her, he felt bad. He could see just how worried she really was. “Oh thank god you are here. What happened? Have you lost your phone? I have been calling you for hours!” As soon as she looked at his face, Eliott could see the realization hitting her. “What’s wrong Eli? What happened? Did you take your meds? Have you been smoking again?” Internally he growled, why was she like this. “Fine. Everything is fine.” As soon as he said it, he knew it was in vain. She could read him like an open book. Perks of being his girlfriend for nearly 3 years now. “Stop it Eliott. Talk to me, please.” Why was he so unfair to her? She was nothing but great to him. Maybe too controlling, maybe a little too worried, too decisive. But he deserved that, after last year. She knew him, she thought that she even knew him better than he knew himself. Maybe she was right. But still, when Lucille sat down next to him, he felt as if he would suffocate. He needed room, everything was spinning again, Elliot wanted to get up, but he was just so damn tired of it all. Tired of himself.

“Well your phone at least seemed to work. What does Kiffance mean?" “Hm?” Lucille put an arm around his back an offered him his phone with the other. “Oh just an event from a few people at school.” She sweetly kissed his cheek. “Do you want to go? Or do you want to stay home, I’ll cook us something? What ever you want.” Oh, she knew him so well. In every other situation he would have taken the second offer, hell before last Friday he would have never thought about the first option at all. How could somebody, a person he seemingly didn’t even know, turn his world around in a matter of days? “I’d like to go.” Lucille raised an eyebrow. “You know I should meet new people, you even said it yourself.” A little smile played around her lips as she nodded. Always so understanding. She really deserved better. “But I don’t want to go there alone. Will you join me?” “Of course, Eliott.” A bright smile graced her face, he hadn’t expected anything else.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I really hope you liked it! Scream with me on my tumblr (mcmaraudonald) or leave a comment if you want. xx


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